Ok but imagine every other Hogwarts student finding out each year why the Defense against the dark arts teacher has left.
"Harry Potter kiLLED HIM WITH HIS BARE HANDS?"
"Harry Potter erASED HIS ENTIRE MEMORY?"
"Harry Potter let hiM TURN INTO A WEREWOLF?"
"Harry Potter disCOVERED HIM IN CHEST??"
"Harry Potter let heR GET CAPTURED BY CENTAURS?"
The improv team I was on in high school only had one rank: “co-captain.” If you joined the improv team, you were automatically a co-captain. It wasn’t to make everyone equal within the club dynamic or anything like that, we just all knew that we would have to list extracurriculars on our college applications, and you could make yourself look more impressive by putting “co-captain” without specifying how many other captains the team had or how a member becomes a captain.